their songs make me feel all the things I wanna feel. Ya dig?
and what kinds of feelings would these be?
Happy, horny, occasionally hungry
With such a small dick you'd think he'd try to make up for it with some sort of personality.
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
No. I heard a cover of "my heart will go on". This is not sanity.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
But in defense of this shit summer we've had, I totally perfected my shotgunning skills. I have achieved my summer goal.
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
WHEN YOU HAVE SEX WITH A GUY FROM A DIFFERENT COUNTRY YOURE SUPPOSED TO NEVER SEE THEM AGAIN
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