How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
my phone needs a breathalizer
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
He's dressed as a power ranger handing out cocaine
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
When I tried to give you a hickey, you karate chopped me in the neck.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
Randomize
