gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
if i die, you can have my worn out liver and american apparel deep v's.sell the liver to a chinese restaurant
I cant wait for the day that I tell my daughter I named her after my favorite porn star.
Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
I'm smoking a bowl with matches and a candle while my mother washes dishes downstairs. I thought adulthood was supposed to be different.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
I will have you know I turned Latino David Arquette down for sex because he's married. Total. Moral. Victory.
Flo's in town, ain't she.
I'm trying to imagine how upset he was when he realized that he had been cockblocked by a picture of a sloth and I am drawing indescribable pleasure from it.
Randomize