so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
Ok get your liver ready for the weekend. Harry Potter Drinking Game Marathon is a go. BYO liquor of choice, rule cards at the door. I wanna see some Hagrid level drinking out of you, Muggle.
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
Side note: I just realized that I can make my hand warmers double as a heated push up bra.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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