i was like a deer caught in headlights with its coke-dick hanging out
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
He's wearing my bra and eating a breadstick while jumping on our bed.....
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Randomize
