The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
If I remember taking any of my finals after tomorrow night, it will not have been a successful night.
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
We need to get sombreros so I can give them to strippers.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I found him in the kitchen singing German metal into a banana while simultaneously mixing brownie batter. He didn't have any pants on.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
then I ended up getting a lapdance from my TA...I love college.
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
I’m going to lick a fucking door knob when this shit is all over
Probably Waffle House
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize