Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (260): View more from Indiana

  So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes

  (1-260): View more from Indiana

  Are your eyes okay

  (260): View more from Indiana

  I mean if I was Asian they would be

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (260): So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes (1-260): Are your eyes okay (260): I mean if I was Asian they would be http://tfl.nu/l3r4
  Replies (8) Good night (2033) Bad night (526)
• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar http://tfl.nu/5trr
  Replies (12) Good night (2953) Bad night (1931) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (323): View more from California

  The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child.

  (1-323): View more from California

  Did you put it in the freezer again?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (323): The idiot babysitter thought my dildo was a teething toy and gave it to our child. (1-323): Did you put it in the freezer again? http://tfl.nu/uvmz
  Replies (29) Good night (832) Bad night (6189) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (812): View more from Indiana

  I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (812): I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos. http://tfl.nu/9xke
  Replies (194) Good night (38109) Bad night (1490) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad. http://tfl.nu/8fn1
  Replies (68) Good night (11804) Bad night (2711)
• Favorite

  (315): View more from New York

  Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (315): Sleepwalking naked until I was 12 made it so much easier to get away with drinking at moms now. http://tfl.nu/rvu6
  Replies (10) Good night (3996) Bad night (834) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (419): View more from Ohio

  you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (419): you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you http://tfl.nu/zo5g
  Replies (7) Good night (3893) Bad night (1076)
• Favorite

  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (918): Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR http://tfl.nu/fkjm
  Replies (22) Good night (4318) Bad night (1110) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (585): View more from New York

  you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (585): you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser http://tfl.nu/abu5
  Replies (5) Good night (2069) Bad night (698) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (267): View more from Pennsylvania

  WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (267): WHY. COME BACK. TRAPPED WITH ROOMMATE AND FALCON. SAVE ME. I HAVE HUMMUS. http://tfl.nu/9tp1
  Replies (10) Good night (2711) Bad night (743) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (859): View more from Kentucky

  heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (859): heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge http://tfl.nu/k74f
  Replies (13) Good night (3347) Bad night (450) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (956): View more from Texas

  Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (956): Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone? http://tfl.nu/ptfa
  Replies (7) Good night (1003) Bad night (398) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (865): View more from Tennessee

  I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (865): I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it http://tfl.nu/0008
  Replies (12) Good night (1451) Bad night (436)
• Favorite

  (916): View more from California

  1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor.

  (707): View more from California

  *roof

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (916): 1 tequila 2 tequila 3 tequila, floor. (707): *roof http://tfl.nu/ph25
  Replies (6) Good night (1605) Bad night (365)
• Favorite

  (219): View more from Indiana

  Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (219): Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon http://tfl.nu/lp84
  Replies (7) Good night (1006) Bad night (237) Order T-Shirt

Randomize