Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (940): View more from Texas

  Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (940): Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost. http://tfl.nu/jz6g
  Replies (25) Good night (620) Bad night (3101)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (954): He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals http://tfl.nu/66nw
  Replies (59) Good night (3631) Bad night (3074)
• Favorite

  (330): View more from Ohio

  i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (330): i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels http://tfl.nu/84kp
  Replies (16) Good night (1232) Bad night (5376)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal http://tfl.nu/oaxp
  Replies (35) Good night (1720) Bad night (4106)
• Favorite

  (402): View more from Nebraska

  Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (402): Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you http://tfl.nu/279j
  Replies (14) Good night (3685) Bad night (1209)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american" http://tfl.nu/1xh1
  Replies (26) Good night (7964) Bad night (1085)
• Favorite

  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (570): who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius... http://tfl.nu/rkbg
  Replies (15) Good night (3635) Bad night (945)
• Favorite

  (316): View more from Kansas

  As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (316): As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on. http://tfl.nu/xyx3
  Replies (6) Good night (623) Bad night (3654)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (803): could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning. http://tfl.nu/cs20
  Replies (2) Good night (1204) Bad night (579)
• Favorite

  (701): View more from North Dakota

  the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.'

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (701): the last call horn was blaring when I tried peeling you off the bathroom floor than you uttered "Ill take the toothless one.' http://tfl.nu/nfi4
  Replies (3) Good night (770) Bad night (1453)
• Favorite

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (304): I accidentally got a lemon stuck in your bong. I was trying to make it taste good. Sorry http://tfl.nu/4kpv
  Replies (5) Good night (1384) Bad night (732)
• Favorite

  (571): View more from Virginia

  Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (571): Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not? http://tfl.nu/ae9g
  Replies (13) Good night (1524) Bad night (506)
• Favorite

  (720): View more from Colorado

  THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (720): THERE IS AN ENORMOUS FAT WOMAN EYEING MY FLIGHT'S GATE LIKE IT WOULD BE DELICIOUS TO EAT. http://tfl.nu/chrb
  Replies (5) Good night (404) Bad night (689)
• Favorite

  (913): View more from Kansas

  did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (913): did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom http://tfl.nu/xnj2
  Replies (5) Good night (1959) Bad night (419)
• Favorite

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  My life hurts

  (615): View more from Tennessee

  I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (615): My life hurts (615): I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake http://tfl.nu/1mlr
  Replies (2) Good night (198) Bad night (326)

Randomize