Texts From Last Night

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  (716): View more from New York

  there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one

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  (716): there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one http://tfl.nu/1wzf
  Replies (3) Good night (1563) Bad night (566)
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  (214): View more from Texas

  And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club

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  (214): And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club http://tfl.nu/ni5q
  Replies (19) Good night (1080) Bad night (3494)
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  (218): View more from Minnesota

  Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.

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  (218): Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace. http://tfl.nu/81g3
  Replies (47) Good night (1043) Bad night (4971)
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  (516): View more from New York

  Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.

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  (516): Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter. http://tfl.nu/yfry
  Replies (74) Good night (782) Bad night (6594)
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  (918): View more from Oklahoma

  no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.

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  (918): no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh. http://tfl.nu/6iss
  Replies (10) Good night (1070) Bad night (3963)
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  (315): View more from New York

  i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.

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  (315): i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there. http://tfl.nu/6jl7
  Replies (6) Good night (2772) Bad night (929)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?

  (1-860): View more from Connecticut

  I don't understand but I'll be there in 5

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  (860): Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt? (1-860): I don't understand but I'll be there in 5 http://tfl.nu/rms0
  Replies (7) Good night (3451) Bad night (829)
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  (563): View more from Iowa

  I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality?

  (208): View more from Idaho

  Beautiful, beautiful reality

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  (563): I vaguely remember having a 'grass is greener' conversation about our nipples. Dream or beautiful reality? (208): Beautiful, beautiful reality http://tfl.nu/pfhr
  Replies (3) Good night (2140) Bad night (647)
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  (845): View more from New York

  You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.

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  (845): You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this. http://tfl.nu/x8z4
  Replies (15) Good night (3221) Bad night (690)
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  (202): View more from Washington, DC

  She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal."

  (301): View more from Maryland

  That wasn't a compliment.

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  (202): She took one look at my hardon and said, "You have a dick built for anal." (301): That wasn't a compliment. http://tfl.nu/gg7a
  Replies (14) Good night (790) Bad night (2327)
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  (989): View more from Michigan

  You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.

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  (989): You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem. http://tfl.nu/ijrf
  Replies (1) Good night (700) Bad night (366)
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad

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  (978): Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad http://tfl.nu/i4wh
  Replies (4) Good night (375) Bad night (842)
• Favorite

  (928): View more from Arizona

  I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink

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  (928): I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink http://tfl.nu/vd8n
  Replies (5) Good night (727) Bad night (413)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit

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  (610): Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit http://tfl.nu/pp9n
  Replies (3) Good night (844) Bad night (257)
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  (480): View more from Arizona

  Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.

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  (480): Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too. http://tfl.nu/o5er
  Replies (2) Good night (632) Bad night (217)

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