You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
after everytime she pucked, she insisted on us all giving her high fives
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
i wish i could post a picture of his odd shaped penis on facebook and label it "wtf???"
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
Just desperately used the "it's a boy" cigar I saved from my\nnephews birth to roll a blunt
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
So I almost broadcasted the porn from my phone to the boardroom chrome cast
dude the dog literally grabbed the condom out of the trash can and threw it in the air i'm screaming
Randomize
