you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Is it weird that I want your dad to go down on me?
Did I show you my penis last night?
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
He stole the megaphone off an ATM then we drove around so he could tell people not to jaywalk.
I was trying to sing daddy wasnt there from austin powers but apparently I was crying and and yelling jibberish...I get to into this shit
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
Randomize
