I had another sleeping on concrete incident.
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
I never thought I'd say this but my vagina is taking a serious break for awhile
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
She called me her guardian angel after I picked her phone up from the river of pee coming from her front porch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The nun costume is coming back hard and it still has glitter and the smell of Vegas on it.
Best. Text. Ever.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
So my balls are accidently making an appearance on snapchat
My party ended early and I have a mountain of shrimp and weed
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
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