I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
i may or may not be watching the land before time
The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I puked in the revolving door and had to sit down on the escalator. That hungover. It's safe to say people are judging me.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
The Deck is crawling with Cougars. Sound the irresponsibility alarm and come drink with me on a Tuesday night.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
We smoked a huge blunt and then laid in bed naked eating strawberry shortcake good humor bars. We have the perfect relationship.
You are the ghost of drunk bitches past, present, and future.
I tired using vodka to remove my makeup
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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