did you ever find your cell phone? and your dignity?
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
this morning i woke up under the kitchen table. i went to my room and there was an inflatable whale in my bed with a banana duct taped to where its penis should be. there were trails of cheez-its around my apartment and i found $67 in the crotch of my underwear. im guessing i had a very happy birthday.
He passed out mid-signature
you yelled "who's job is it to keep me from breaking shit" and then immediately ripped off the molding as you fell down the stairs.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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