Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
Man I'll cab it I'll be sloshed by then. There's turtles involved
So it finally happened last night... I re-met someone that i've already had sex with. Had no idea who he was. Fantastic
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Maybe I’ll just go to the party as myself
What, a homewrecker?
Touché
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