due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
she named each of the players on the last ten madden covers in order and then shotgunned 2 beers...if she doesnt have a penis im in love
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
Mom said you looked used
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
somehow he and i always have our deepest conversations after phone sex.
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Yeah probably not. I have a hair appt, a gun class, and hopefully a boy to fuck. I'm booked.
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
