Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
She just said she finds Tyler Perry funny... this is not going to work.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
My getting drunk and marrying a stranger in Vegas final court annulment papers just came in the mail... I might frame that shit
That bitch ruined vodka saturday
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
I mean it was his birthday. How was I supposed to tell him he could not wear a sombrero while we bang.
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
I don't know whether to be insulted or flattered that I am being propositioned to have a threesome only if I wear my cat onesie
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
