Um, I don't really remember much about the event... and then I woke up on the metro..
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
you blew your rape whistle in his face every time he got near a girl till he left the party...
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
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