the chick doesn't look like she's put anything in her mouth for weeks other than his dick.
i really thought "pants-shitting drunk" was an unreachable level until last night
If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
We found her on the trampoline. She told us she was jumping so she could puke & rally. I think I want to marry her.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
If you're mature enough to fuck him you're mature enough to tell him you don't want a relationship come on
Tackling and headbutting friends, running away and hiding from everyone, attempting to streak across campus, and then waking up with no sign of a hangover... happy 21 to me
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
I'm so gassy and it's your fault.
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