I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
There was just way too much discussion about my penis at that party
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
Randomize
