you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
it's kind of nice to have a picture of me making out with someone and actually know who it is for once
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Not gonna lie i was comfortable between the allsups air conditioners while you were talking to the cop.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
a guy just skateboarded past my window in a bunny suit while chased by a dog walker
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
Sadly my Summer of Cocks is coming to an end
Randomize
