i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
The second he texted me with "*dry humps you!*" I knew any relationship we might have had was over.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Better than last year. I didn't wake up to an after thanksgiving human shit on my living room floor. I think it's a sign I'm growing up at almost 30.
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
He eats ass but won’t hold open doors. My kinda guy.
Chivalry really is dead.
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
Randomize
