never have phone sex with a hardcore republican during this health care crisis . just dont.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
You were definitely doing something right. You could only see the colored parts of his eyes a couple of times. I was pretty sure he was dead at some point.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
I promise I won't bug you anymore, I just need the following things at your convenience but preferably soon: my earrings, cup, and panties. Thanks. Good talk.
Randomize
