So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
drunk freshman in the bathroom puking keeps saying "i'm a peasant" over and over
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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