Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
the best part about tonight...knowing when i wake up in the morning his car will still be full of packing peanuts..and mine wont
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
based on the size of her vibrator, i'm going to be a huge disappointment
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
you realize you insisted on them having a dance off to korean music to determine who takes you home?
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
there were rolls with just one bite out of each one leading to the bedroom. you were laying on the bed naked and yelled 'you did it you followed the bread crumbs!'
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
