never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
Just tried my new showerhead. Sex with Brian will never be the same.
its cute though when you google his name more than one mug shot comes up from different states
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
Randomize
