I think I just saw someone hide a body.
he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
You owe me new eyes. The ones I have are burned with your balls into the back of my eyes. And every time I close them, your balls are right there...
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I am far too hungover to deal with the fact I can hear you masturbating in the bathroom.
Are you responsible for the syringes and miniature cactus garden that has magically taken over my fridge?
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize
