with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
I just found puke in my bra..
organizing the empties. That sober.
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Since i didn't have a condom I told him to use jump ship method, I think I was overly invested in my sailor costume this year.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
I bit my tongue so hard I left a deep imprint. Fuck you tongue, stop getting in the way of food.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
