The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I just entered us to win a trip to Vegas for spring break. GET YOUR VAGINA READY FOR THE ULTIMATE DICK HUNT!
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
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