yo my bday is less then one week away. hope youve found another annoying candian i can lick dairy products off of. also sorry about your loss
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
gettin pulled by a cop with a camera crew. gonna flee. want my 15 min of fame on cops.
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
And to be fair, I think we all suspect that forbidden sex with an outlaw biker might be worth it.
Randomize
