I'm really into asian looking animals
we were having sex in the bathroom when his aunt knocked on the door
and rather than go out and meet her, i climbed out the window. so now she thinks he was masturbating and moaning his own name in a really girly voice
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Matt just took me to visit my puke stain from 2 weeks ago at the train station...I'm fucking impressive
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
Well Its not like I planned having my potato launcher explode and burn off my eyebrow and eye lashes.. I still have my right eyebrow can't u just be happy?
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
I mean seriously...It's like the universe is saying "your vagina is closed, move along"
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
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