Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
I just sneezed alcohol in a candle and started a fire.
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
Someone got day drunk, but I'm not saying who.
It was me.
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
Almost stopped showering halfway through to go get food
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Just sold my panties for 40 bucks to some rando dude at the gay bar. I think I found a way to fund next years spring break trip. Hello cancun!
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
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