is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
probably one of the worst weekends ever... i got peed on by his sleepwalking roommate.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
I'd like to thank you for ensuring I didn't die. Id also like to show you the most impressive bruise you will perhaps ever see
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
I feel like my sexual preferences are just another sign that I am a 75 year old drag queen in a 29 year old woman's body.
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
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