If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
I'm doing the Macarena naked in my living room right now
I see you're taking unemployment seriously.
I mean he did ask and he said it's cold out but i didn't realize we were that comfortable hahaha sex is one thing but borrowing a sweatshirt?
Locking that text forever.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
Don't try to butter me sideways
That is without a doubt the most Southern thing you have ever said.
He was literally screaming at me for using the same knife to scoop the peanut butter and the jelly.
I sharted in court today and had to sit on it for about three and a half hours.
Randomize
