Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
The iPad is going to make my porn collection SO much more glossier... thanks steve jobs.
picked up a girl by parallel parking. i love this town already.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
fun fact: in my eskimo family tree i am the only brunette
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that's why god made me a woman. Bc it's harder to slap people in the face with a vagina.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
I'm trying to be all porn star and he's making it all The Notebook
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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