Tell her to GTFO!!!!! JAI HO!!!!!
If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
if he wont fuck me on the stairamster then i dont think theres much XXX shit going down
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I didn't talk to any girls wearing masks because I wanted to avoid making the big mistake of making out with my sister.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
You were cussing me out in sign language, and slurring your signs.
That's some kind of record drunk there...
Let's take a shot for every time we've said "I don't want to get that drunk tonight"
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
