I think I gave almost everyone at that party the clap last night
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
You asked her to play "the coma game" with you while hooking up, and then passed out in her bed. She couldn't wake you up so she slept on the floor.
Looks like I won that one
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
We bought a pool from walmart at 2am...and to make matters even more white trash we headed to Applebee's for half off appetizers and corona-ritas
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
I hope none of us try to run for public office one day
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Randomize
