you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
just sold my soul for a pack of cigaroos. little do they know they got the short end of the deal. suckers.
Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
TOMORROW NIGHT CAN I HOLD YOU LIKE A BABY
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
Also, I just realized you seduced me while in a batman onesie... Well done, sir. Well done.
So is it safe to say that my only objective from last night is to finish this entire jar of peanut butter?
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
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