I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
i cannot be the only guy who has bought the every day with rachael ray magazine for use as porn
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
There's "red head", "preppy white girl" and "the two Asians I dated and now everyone thinks I like Asians"
Your dating history is like the united colors of Benetton
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
No one should have to go to work between Christmas and New Years, but here I am twirling in my office chair and putting Jack in my coffee like I’m back in college studying for finals.
She was pretty impressed that I led all thirty of us back to campus in my state of drunk. Evidently so impressed that she now refers to me as "Moses" in bed.
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