How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
I'm currently googling how to make a dress out of a trash bag. It's going to be a great night.
I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
basically theres shrimp everywhere. splattered on the walls, in the carpet, its bad. ohh theyre never gonna get the smell out.
I ordered a VEGAN pizza, because it gets here the fastest, just so I could get a 2 litre of Coke. For my whiskey.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
And despite my lack of successful relationships I'm a fucking guru
That's like claiming you're a good coach but going 2-12 last season
Randomize
