I was just curling my hair topless and I just burned my nipple. Ouch.
shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
Thank you for making it possible for me to get laid while having peace of mind my dog is well taken care of.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Wanna meet at the diner for breakfast? all I've eaten in the past 24 hours is glitter and penis. starvingg.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
Randomize
