At a straight bar and poker face just came on...must...resist....urge to gay it up
Why would that come on at a straight bar? I thought they just played Don't Stop Believin and Wonderwall on repeat
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Just realized that St. Patty's is on a Saturday this year in case you were interested in coming to New York and redefining bender with me.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
You just kept walking around in a circle saying "well played 6th street well played" before falling over.
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I have poison ivy and a broken finger. Don't have a threesome in the woods.
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
Randomize
