I heard some girl say 'yeah he mustve been so drunk he kept mumbling and repeating himself'
And I thought
Fuck I do that shit every weekend
In retrospect, pretending to punch a 9 year old girl in the face was a terrible analogy to use in a piano lesson.
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
He threw up the X he took like 30min before then when we thought his antics were over... BOOM! He tried to pee out a light he was holding.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
We are buying drugs from a guy with a Jesus fish on his dodge caravan.
All I want is dick and wine.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
