we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
I mean I feel like if you explain to the emoji app company that your friend got plastered and fell to the ground and is trying to scheme her way back to normal life and get her dignity back they would understand just how necessary it is to have a fingers crossed emoji...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom is currently out with her lesbian friends and I'm home alone drunk listening to the Les Miserables soundtrack. WHY DO I FEEL THE NEED TO COMPETE WITH HER?
She didn't complain to the library attendant about us being too loud. She complained after you grabbed her highlighter off the table to stir vodka into your tumbler with.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
That was the best shit ever it was like an exorcism for my colon
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
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