I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
Flowers- 20. Dinner-50. Drinks- 25. Hotel- 150. The look on his face when I tell him I'm on my period? Priceless.
I never said you were fat, just too fat for ME
on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..
who won?
THAT is your concern right now?
this is the fifth day in a row i've woken up after 3 pm, hungover. I might die when snowmageddon is finally over and we have to go back to class. my liver wont know how to take it.
Woke up to a bouquet of flowers in my toilet bowl. Drunk hubby loves me.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
All I've done this weekend is cum and drink. I think it's safe to say I'm dehydrated.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
