Do you have a straightener and are extra lubricated condoms not the norm?
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
So he asked me last night if I would cheer him on while he masturbated...
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I watched her follow him out of the bar, chase him around the corner and literally throat punch him. It was awesome.
True strength comes from lack of pants
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
Randomize
