the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Hungover like ... in bed with the Brita pitcher and a straw, only opening one eye at a time.
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
Remember that pineapple I soaked in vodka last month? Just found it- nothing is growing on it? Think it's safe?
She ended up puking in the bathroom. But she's a good drunk... i told her to stay in there so i could dance til the club closed. She was still in the stall an hour later.
Too lazy to make dinner. Had chocolate and scotch instead. Check in with me in a half hour.
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
We need to get stoned and watch Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 2. This has become a priority. Schedule accordingly.
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
so then the cop took one last hit off our blunt and then drove off in his car and we just all stood there thinking, yea... that just happened...
Remember how I made that resolution to remain celibate for 6 months? Well, I just broke that
You literally made that 4 hours ago...
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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