a smallpox vaccine scar is like a lower back tattoo.
I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I was about to watch some really classy porn. Title was ravenous for dick. I didnt know pornstars knew ravenous was a word.
dude, showing up drunk to physics was the best idea ever. I just tripled my participation for the semester. I love st pattys day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i actually pissed myself from laughing when I saw the old man in lingerie carrying a spiderman purse. I dont know if he was real or if it was the tequila, but my head hurts.
when i first looked at you, you weren't wearing any pants. but then i realized you had them around your neck as a cape.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I am at Brians in a pirate costume, what the hell am I thinking
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know I'm high, but the dude in target definitely just told me that it's best to walk through every door in life like you're a t-rex....
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
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