great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
Heated debate on which is worse. Pissing your pants or puking all over yourself
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Not sure what time I'll be home. I'm currently topless and the damn stripper won't give me my clothes back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So is it your turn now to pretend like dating someone else would stop us from fucking?
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
Drunk twilight is the only twilight
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