I can totally hide my daquiri in my sling.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
The only thing i was looking forward to on 4th of july was the google logo and they let me down. That and beer, lots and lots of beer
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I think i lit a firework with a joint. happy birthday, america?
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
My mom just told me the story of how she met my dad through prison. How was your saturday?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Come to this bar
But I'm full of food.
MAKE ME FULL OF YOUR DICK
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
Randomize
