my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
okay I may or may not have wrapped my body pillow up in your t-shirt and sprayed it with your axe and am now spooning with it.
again? I'm starting to get a little creeped out now.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
Security said no more parties of this kind. To me that translates to Theme party this weekend.
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
the two person party stopped when i realized that he tried to throw a hammer at my head.
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
If we tried baptizing you I feel the water would start boiling around you.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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