I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
My student's should feel privledged to see me tuesday after the amount of alcohol I consumed this weekend.
My dad walked in on me masturbating in my own apartment.....my own apartment!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I'll just be sleeping in this laundry room. Come get me at bar close.
Dude, we apparently put a washing machine drum in that back of your truck with the full intention of making a bonfire in it.
you were drunkenly making out with a 20-something in front of your wife. at least the guy your wife left with was decent looking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Come get your pancakes and take a nap in my boobs.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
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